Is there a way to set it so that the mouse wheel zoom in Google Maps zooms more or less?
I don't believe so. I thought you might be able to by changing your mouse wheel's zoom in your operating system (Windows: Control Panel > Mouse > Wheel). However, I just tried it and it doesn't do anything either.
It seems that even in embedded maps, the API only allows an enable/disable. It doesn't have any settings related to it.